Monday, November 30, 2009
I feel lonely. I wonder how much I'll hurt when it ends. With my 'new found strength' and everything.

daiyum. another pimple D: rawwrrrrr

{ 11:08 AM }

love game?
Friday, November 27, 2009
Men. Only interested in the thrill of the chase. they bear their hearts out in the most noble, self-sacrificial manner to get u on by their side. they candy coat their actions and words with the sweetest mix . And when u finally give in. when they are finally sure that your heart belongs to them and no other they cant be bothered to give a shxt about u anymore. pffttt. so the thing is u gotta keep running . u gotta keep maintaining just enuff distance to make him want u but not to bore him away. s0o0o0o0o0o annoying! and tiring.

RAH

{ 2:06 AM }

Thursday, November 26, 2009
hi darius. u're prolly the only one who still reads this space. laughs. see u soon

Think i'm growing fat. exams make me fat. :(

{ 11:41 AM }

Wednesday, November 25, 2009
4am. i'm about to crash.

Had this interesting conversation with the boy last night. Made me ponder about how right is it to put your heart out. For me i like to be safe. I need to know that the guy is worth it before i offer him my palpitating organ. I need to know that if he ever does stab it or smash it. it'd be worth it. Is this wrong????

why is willy exposing himself when clearly, the risk of a heartbreak is...almost not a risk at all; its almost certain. I dont understand.

whats right?

For me, its the fear of my significant other harbouring some ingenuine motives behind his seemingly honest/truthful/best guy i cud ever ask for persona. Or maybe its the acknowledge that since i'm capable of suckering..he's equally capable..and i dont want to be the hare. i'm so paranoid about what others might think of me that i'm not willing to take a leap of faith. Is this..wrong? Is this detrimental ?

i doubt i'm the only one. Im pretty sure most people are this way. we all want the purest most infinite form of love but are scrambling, on our limbs, in pathetic desperation for a crack or glitch which will allows us to cheat the system..even if its just abit. thinking that maybe, maybe its possible us to reap more than what we sow. To get more in return than the meagre effort that we put in.

Even if u do succeed, i dont think it'll feel right. Everything just goes downhill from there.

{ 11:55 AM }

Saturday, November 21, 2009
ok i am damn irritated . I hate talking to people who do not know how to talk. If u got nothing better to say, just shut up. If u're feeling cranky, keep ur snide remarks to urself. If u're too insecure to say something stupid thn STFU as well. I dont appreciate people with no sense of humour, i dont appreciate boring conversations. if u wanna talk to me u damn well better be cordial. rrrr

{ 9:45 AM }

Friday, November 20, 2009
I keep writing myself into rust, its all around us. Get naked and get into bed right away. Get naked and get into my arms as fast as you can...

i layed below him. feeling absolutely vulnerable with nothing serpating us except the delicate nature-ordained barrier of the flesh. When he kissed me i couldnt help but smile as anthony green crooned in his unique fashion...

...she loves me so....SHE LOVES ME SOO-OHHOHHHH


{ 12:59 PM }

Thursday, November 19, 2009
love of my life. the only one in my heart- you make me feel ugly

{ 11:41 AM }

Argh. i wasted more time thn i ought to on the goddamn article on class politics by greg luebbert. AND I HATE IT. I HATE THE ARTICLE I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT. middle class peasants, landed elites, rural poletariat, oewrjfihdfawejfdn FUCK U

on a lighter note, baby ordered macs for me this morning. HOT CAKES MY FAVOURITE. now i know why he forbid me to have macs lat night. now i know why he wanted me to wake up at 9 in the morn to study. so sweet. cant stand it. <3

ok i'm off for a nicotine break. CRANKY CRANKY CRANKY.

{ 5:07 AM }

Wednesday, November 18, 2009
I feel so far away from the boy that i dont know what to say. I have not had the chance to talk to him properly in two days and i'm not particularly upset about it. dont really know what to make about that. Guess i'm too preoccupied with work. Which means this is a damn good time for him to meet all the cunts he has to meet before i'm finally free.

{ 12:04 PM }

Sunday, November 15, 2009
"Women tear each other apart. Girls think I'm a slut, and I've been in the same relationship since I was 18. The problem is, if they think you're attractive, you're either stupid or a whore or a dumb whore. The instinct among girls is to attack the jugular." - Megan Fox

{ 7:45 AM }

Wednesday, November 11, 2009
You dont care because you dont know how it feels....yet.

{ 11:54 AM }

thats right babeh, i'm going crazeh
Monday, November 09, 2009
while willy's having his anger bouts, i'm have like anxiety bouts. Its insane. i'm insane. I confess that i do not have a sound frame of mind. Again and agian i find myself struggling between two. Being myself, being honest and truthful and bring myself to love sb else makes me so goddamn vulnerable that i find myself clamouring for protection. The right form of security, the right form of comfort and assurance. The right form comes rarely. .. second..best.

The only viable way out is distance. I have exposed myself too much and who better to help me than myself? sigh.

{ 10:58 AM }

Well I wish there was someone,To love me. When I used to be someone,a nd I knew there was someone,that loved me. As I sit here frozen alone,Even ghosts get tired and go home,a s they crawl back under the stones. And I wish there was something. Please tell me there’s something better. And I wish there was something more than this,Saturated loneliness.

and i wish there was something, i wish there was something better. please tell me there's something better.



{ 10:20 AM }

Thursday, November 05, 2009
baby, i'm electric! says:
domdomdom
what are you doing


*Neversweet 'no love ' mommys-lil-monster.blogspot.com says:
doing notes for social work
groans
was gon complain to u
FUCKING DRY AND BORING LAH

baby, i'm electric! says:
hahaha
hurhur, sounds like bad sex


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA?!?!!?!?

{ 10:38 AM }

Tuesday, November 03, 2009
you're right.

{ 9:50 AM }

Sunday, November 01, 2009
He looked me in the eye and told me that i was his precious. unbelievable. I was speechless. I looked away. i couldnt handle him lying straight in my face.

well . he's back. Back to the same ol cycle..? sigh.

I think i've changed..or not.

I dont know if i can handle..this. the insecurity that eats me inside out.

And its not that i dont wanna write to him. Its just tt everytime i think of writing something, the words string out a completely ominous letter. which isnt exactly what he's gg for anyway. so i refrain. sigh

sigh. why am i doing this.

{ 12:24 AM }

Neversweet*

There are bullet holes where compassion used to be
Loves

Hanabanana Choo Wei Chen Ben Fong Nick Gary
Dont look back

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